While having sex with my ex-husband, I fantasized about being with another woman. Not once... a lot!
I once asked my ex if he ever fantasized about having a threesome. He said no. I told him that I had one before. He said he didn't want to hear the details and preferred not to talk about me having sex with anyone else. And that was the last time we ever talked about my sexual history.
I respected this boundary he had set even though I very much wanted to talk to him about it all.
I didn't just have one threesome but hat I had had several threesomes. I had multiple experiences with other women. I even had a situation with 5 people when I was younger.
But they always involved alcohol, were never planned, and were never talked about afterwards. I was definitely ashamed of them and felt guilty afterwards. Then when my husband shut down that conversation I felt even more ashamed, which I honestly didn't think was possible.
After I separated from my ex, I made a decision to live life on my terms. I was ready to go explore my sexuality even though I was actually quite scared to.
I didn't know where or how to begin. All I knew was that I wanted to go make new memories. Memories without feeling ashamed. Memories from intentional sexual experiences. Memories that included multiple people.
I knew without a doubt that I wanted to have a threesome.
Not knowing how to make a threesome happen, I turned to Google, of course. I searched for "the best way to find a couple for a threesome." Sadly, there wasn't ANY good information to find.
Deep on the umpteenth page I saw a listing on Craigslist with a description that said "MW couple looking for Woman". I nervously clicked through and was surprised to see that there were lots of couples looking for a woman to join them. (I now laugh at how naïve I was to Unicorn Hunting)
Palms sweating, I replied to a few of the ads. After some funny sexual experiences, lots of trial and error (mostly error), I eventually met a really fun couple.
The first time we were together the woman asked me if I had ever squirted. I didn't even know what she was talking about. She turned to her man and said "Honey, make her squirt." And he did! (He used his fingers and some pretty good upper arm strength, too)
My mind was completely blown. I had no idea that my body could do that.
I also needed to figure out exactly how he did it so I could help other people do it to me again. And if you're wondering, that was the catalyst that began my journey to become an orgasm coach!
Thus began a years long journey of experimenting, exploring, and discovering all of the many ways my body can orgasm. Oh yes, there are many, many paths to orgasm... not just through the clitoris.